The movie…the plot…the pain I felt when I saw my life as an educational entrepreneur, played out on the big screen…
That wasn't MY life??? It was about a family in Korea with subtitles in Spanish? Well you could have fooled me!
Here is what we will cover today in the FEAR-busting post:
- Figure out if you are you a Parasite magnet. You can be an innocent connector, bringing FEARful bugs to yourself and others!
- Where parasites are commonly located. There are cesspools where parasites thrive!
- Warning Signs and Symptoms. Is my life is infected?
- How to exile FEARful parasites.
- Silver Lining...there always is one when learning!
PARASITES Are Everywhere.
It's better to FEAR-proof your family, with BEST PRACTICES for your 0-3 year old.
BONUS...Your children don’t become PARASITES themselves! You see, the CURE for PARASITES is QUALITY EDUCATION!
THINK: Who kills parasites? SCIENTISTS!
Teaching S.T.E.A.M.M. (Science, Technology, Engineering, Art, Math, Music) is a shield for our children!
S.T.E.A.M.M. Promotes 2020 Necessary Skills such as complex problem solving, coordinating with others, creativity, critical thinking, people management, emotional intelligence, judgement and decision making, service orientation, negotiation, cognitive flexibility.
Children who do IQ and EQ skills during 0-3 education, he/she train the brain to do highly complex tasks while the frontal lobe of the brain is developing. The brain needs help building Executive Function during the prime time of brain development! This is how the best geniuses are made!
And how are these 21st century POWER SKILLS learned?
Children learn how to protect themselves from PARASITES through PLAY???
This month you can see S.T.E.A.M.M. learning in action with our largest community event, Arco for Fun:
FEARful people "PARASTORY" IS all too familiar at English for Fun...
As part of our journey, we have seen MANY bottom feeders. The ones who come in, know everything that you are doing wrong, have all the right words to believe they're key to fixing your "pains", yet mysteriously CAN'T do anything (figured out once parasite is inside). Opinions are easier than hard work, passion, persistence and resilience.
In the age of over-protection and under-preparation for the realities of life (NEWSFLASH-IT'S HARD). We are not allowing our kids to develop the tools survive! I'm here to warn you about the types of people that the modern-day world of blowhards and "fake news" is producing. It's a NEW global world where criticism from the "cheap seats" beats solutions. One where excuses and blame are no longer seen as signs of laziness.
My college softball coach used to say, "Losers make excuses...Now sprint a mile to remember why we WIN!" And I did it, in the snow, uphill, both ways! (OK, I studied in Los Angeles, CA but you get my point).
So as long as the tired and "unwilling to retire" continue to fight against transition, and the "powers that be" slowly lose the battle to maintain their hierarchies...
We are stuck with teaching our kids coping skills to combat FEARful people! Industrial Revolution Education STILL produces an abundance of PARASITES who wreak havoc on our community. Fixed Mindset people WILL NOT transition into the 21st century. They get NASTY and threatened when they have to grow and try new things. Parasites like stagnant water and cesspools! Alone they are nothing so they attach themselves to unsuspecting people or they find like-minded parasites and form bonds.
Is this WHY we see more PARASITIC humans RIGHT NOW?
TIMES OF TRANSITION HEIGHTEN FEARS BECAUSE PARASITES HATE CHANGE!
5 T.I.P.S. to Avoid and Eliminate PARASITES:
1. Parasite Magnets
"It can't be me? I'm creative, I'm highly-social so I have lots of friends and I like to connect people, I'm generous, I work hard so cool things happen around me."
Are you Brilliant, Ethical, Moral, Innovative, Alive? YES, you attract those pesky trouble makers! It is just like a Parasite to ASSUME that proper human values are contagious...or a sign of weakness.
NO FEAR...keep reading!
We "PARASITE protect" children by teaching the Interpersonal Skills that will help them cope with FEARful people. But mom and dad need care in times of transition because the parasites start seeking out new prey. Mediocre people stay in their own communities when the economy is going well. BUT the second things change, they need to search for new places to infest. And once you get them in your space, they are tough to get rid of!
Parasites are prevalent in **CASTE societies where connections are the common way of doing business or making life choices. They swarm around the **Upper Class, "2%" part of society where there are larger sums of money to swindle but they also go near professionals who are vulnerable and learning to trust instincts to make important choices (**Startups and PYMES).
My FEAR of doing the parts of my company that I did not understand meant that my "parasite instinct filter" was lower! I have many degrees in education (hence the strong academic programs) but I did not study business management. Was I EXPECTED to do that too?!? I learned the HARD way because I do business cross-culturally (not understanding social cues). I innocently thought that everyone put children and learning and respect for others first, just like me!
Marketing companies and consultants WERE my biggest "PAINS", connected by others with the intention of taking money without giving anything valuable in return!
Psychotherapy is significantly more important today. Pent up issues in adulthood usually stem from ATTACHMENT in the 0-3 period of our lives. There is real research, especially behind Developmental Psychology and it is key to fixing modern-day problems in society. The smartest minds are now going into the ECE research. The Bezos Foundation, YALE, Harvard, etc. are investing huge sums of money into studying the baby brain. Building the brain correctly is the key to unlocking a THRIVING future for adults.
A trained therapist is regulated and licensed by governments, just like doctors, teachers and lawyers. WE are forced to carry liability/malpractice insurance in case errors are made in manipulating the minds and the bodies of HUMANS.
The same regulations are not held up with "Consultants", "Coaches" and "Healers". They take courses through reputable schools and earn certificates. Many DO help frustrated adults work through issues that hold them back from success. However, they aren't officially regulated by any government issued university title that takes 4+ full-time years to earn... Degrees which are tied to a "life calling", bringing us to study education/psychology/medicine at the age of 18. We blindly trust coaches and consultants, HOPING they will USE our PRIVATE and PERSONAL information ethically and help us grow.
However, I have seen all too often, the redundant, mid-career professional, reinvent herself in a coaching course and then use the role to connect friends and family to receptive business owners. The "coaches", "consultants" and "healers" connect receptive business owners with even more "consultants"! One "Coach", who didn't finish paid assignments because a better opportunity came along mid-project, did something before leaving. "Coach" connected a hopeful business owner with a "marketing" company. We Learning did not EVEN REMOTELY achieve set goals. And while the company fought to open the new FLAGSHIP school (winning case in December 2019, after 3 year battle), marketing company SUED to charge an unearned bonus, using falsified emails and doctored contracts to prove the case. "Coach" recommended agency already received 60,000€ in monthly fees and extras without meeting sales goals. But Parasites always want more and they love to KICK people when they are down!
** After encountering numerous marketing companies, consultants and coaches who abide by these practices, we bought a license and training in digital marketing and learned ourselves instead of trusting consultants!
3. Parasite Warning Signs and Symptoms
Symptoms are just like an infecting BUG: nervous sweats, diarrhea, fatigue, joint pain, stomachache, nausea
- Friends are parasites (See movie, SMELL reference-"they smell the same")
- Create conflict amongst those who care to drive a wedge in the TEAM using tactics such as blaming others, constant excuses, staging drama to deflect from themselves. Work tirelessly to eliminate those who doubt them (See movie-panties and peach fuzz)
- Need a RECOMMENDATION/REFERRAL to get a job (See movie-dad waiting for siblings to bring him into the scam instead of finding a job himself)
- Sneaky, dishonest, gives you a "bad feeling" in your stomach. Your body will feel "off" immediately and you will become a nervous person or unnecessarily stressed out (See movie-mom's stress increased daily from the moment parasite walked in)
- Makes comments that drag you and others down. Backhanded-compliments, condescending and passive-aggressive behavior will suddenly make you feel doubtful about your abilities (See movie-driver asks the husband if it's ACTUALLY possible to love a "wife like that")
- Try to make you do or say things that you know are wrong (See Movie-tutor kissing the UNDERAGE student)
- Focuses on criticizing and judging others rather than talking about personal and professional GOALS. Badmouthing others forms TOXIC bonds, creating silos in community (See movie-Driver accuses the loyal housekeeper of hiding TB)
- "What's in it for ME?" attitude, immediately ask for "more" without proving worth. When about to get caught, makes excuse for potential failure (See movie-"Art Therapist" immediately asks for 2 hour classes, 4 days a week and no adult present)
If you have read this far, you are already infected.
You have gone through the WORST part: infection and diagnosis
Face your FEARs and get parasites out!
- Watch the movie PARASITE . Does anything resonate? IF you see yourself, you CAN change. The human brain is flexible and loves learning new things. Parasitic behavior is NURTURE! You are not "destined" to be a bug that is found in cesspools and near feces forever. If you stay, that's a choice!
- Create Your Timeline. When did life started feeling like it was spiraling? Having kids while starting a business in 2008 means that my timeline is 100% connected to English for Fun. It was originally to create a Marketing Content Library and empower our team. But it started to empower me by spotting TOXIC people and situations in my journey as an entrepreneur. So I decided to share this resource when I realized I felt stronger and more confident. CONTINUOUS DEVELOPMENT is powerful! Learning digital marketing, and overcoming a FEAR of technology, has been HEALING. This timeline helped through the PTSD that business ownership has caused over the last 11 years!
- Map it out! The timeline brought up memories errors I have made along the way. I made a list of people/companies who had caused pain or when around them, I felt chaotic. When I was experiencing something new, FEAR of the unknown opened me up to toxic people. It was an "excuse" to doubt myself (as a business owner, mom, believer of comments by "false friends" or judgmental coworkers, etc.). I noticed behavior patterns by connecting people, places and events. When I wasn't paying attention to my own moral compass, I allowed questionable people to guide me (cut me some slack, there is one of me and I have young children who were born during all of this). FINALLY, I highlighted trends in the parasites and connectors to find the common denominator (Narcissistic Personality Disorder).
- Remove ALL parasites from your life, especially those connected to the parasites who did you or your family harm! We have to make hard choices, especially "fake friends" (anyone who encourages or mentoring you to make decisions that hurt others is a parasite, using you for their own personal gain, you are better to walk away first). If you keep parasite connectors, it's the same as having the original parasite. You will not move forward until you remove everyone who is connected.
***One disappointing realization was that there is no respect for referrals. The endorsed party is NOT concerned AT ALL with setting a good example when given as a reference! Is a reference a license to rip someone off??? My parasite map...The PARASITE movie confirmed that it's a global trend.
My life lesson is NO recommendations. DON'T be LAZY! Do my own research! If they are good, they will earn it themselves!
5. The Silver Lining
I was FURIOUS in the Parasite movie, listening to how those SCUMBAGS talked about the "naive" woman who hired them. If you do business and live in the NORMAL way you WON'T know what kind of swindlers to look out for! It is interesting that the parasites laugh at the "innocent" family when everyone really laughs at THEM! Who is sitting on top of a FECES spraying toilet, smoking cigarettes, while others drink bottled water from a sterile refrigerator? The silver lining...if you are laughed at by parasites, EVEN BETTER because it means that you aren't the SCUM OF THE EARTH like they are!
Every time we recover from parasites, we are more EMPOWERED because we have survived something unimaginable. Through that resilience and GRIT, we realize the depth of our own abilities. And since spoiled cultures produce spoiled citizens, it is good for us to test our own strength, just to prove that we can handle anything. There ARE worse problems to have in a society than a bunch of parasites (poor health care, hungry children, etc.)!
Self-efficacy is what we want for our children. Modeling how we survive and THRIVE is a great way to teach kids!